As my time in Mexico is ticking away (3 weeks left!), one thing
that continually crosses my mind is when

I start to get sentimental is, "at least I will have my own room again."  Living in community can be so difficult, but
the Lord is reminding me of what a refining process it is.  I can't have things exactly the way I want
them to be, catered to my preferences, which can be frustrating, because many
of you can attest that I am a woman of many systems.  I really like my systems.  They work for me.  But when I really think about it, the last thing I want to be is like King
Nebuchadnezzar, "contented and prosperous" in my "palace"- what a dangerous
place to be in, where you control everything about your little world.  We had some teachers fly down for the week to
talk about worship, and one of the things Dick, who used to be a Chemistry
professor, mentioned was that He saw us as diamonds, sitting on a backdrop of
carbon.  We start out as just ordinary
matter, but in the heat of the furnace of living in community (and it sure can
get hot in here!) comes this priceless opportunity for God to refine us into
diamonds.  Not that I feel like I've been
perfected this year- as soon as I think "I'm doing pretty well these days" I've
fallen into the miry pit of pride, where the darkest sin lurks- of thinking I
can do anything without Jesus.  But instead of
sitting around mourning over how crappy and dark my heart is, the Lord is
teaching me what He taught His people in Nehemiah 8- God's holiness is actually
violated if we have accepted him as our Savior and we still dwell in our sin.  May the JOY of the Lord be our strength!